Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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