went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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