party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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