508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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