Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
