I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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