Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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