Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
