please come you make the beer taste better
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom