The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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