It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize