The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
