Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
