Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize