I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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