what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
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