Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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