is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
