It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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