I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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