time to smoke my breakfast
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize