Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize