Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
