cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The uberlube is also flammable
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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