I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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