i think my mom watched the whole time
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize