forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
