Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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