he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Randomize