I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
