Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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