Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
