I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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