covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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