The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
