the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize