YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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