her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
