LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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