Texts From Last Night

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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.

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  (770): Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird. http://tfl.nu/gky6
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.

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  (704): I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing. http://tfl.nu/dymp
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.

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  (309): so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday. http://tfl.nu/j6eg
  Replies (8) Good night (5271) Bad night (722)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.

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  (908): i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone. http://tfl.nu/i40f
  Replies (23) Good night (6655) Bad night (1384)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.

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  (765): he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law. http://tfl.nu/4onk
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone

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  (903): I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone http://tfl.nu/vw3h
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.

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  (512): Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person. http://tfl.nu/kj3e
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  (713): View more from Texas

  My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal

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  (713): My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal http://tfl.nu/z8hr
  Replies (6) Good night (1638) Bad night (469) Order T-Shirt
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  (408): View more from California

  Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.

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  (408): Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding. http://tfl.nu/vpqq
  Replies (5) Good night (490) Bad night (1053) Order T-Shirt
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear

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  (336): I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear http://tfl.nu/gomj
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.

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  (+44): I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks. http://tfl.nu/6xxg
  Replies (0) Good night (765) Bad night (285)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.

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  (505): Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds. http://tfl.nu/oq4c
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  (360): View more from Washington

  There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.

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  (360): There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle. http://tfl.nu/htoq
  Replies (8) Good night (691) Bad night (206) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  You are a god.

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  (803): Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning. (1-803): You are a god. http://tfl.nu/xtrk
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  (760): View more from California

  My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town

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  (760): My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town http://tfl.nu/5sn6
  Replies (0) Good night (827) Bad night (126) Order T-Shirt

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