no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
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I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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