Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
