you would pick up someone in the library
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
