nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought