I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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