Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
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