i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
