If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
why is half of my head shaved?
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