I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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