During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
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Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
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he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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